Thursday, July 23, 2009
When your face
appeared over my crumpled life
at first I understood
only the poverty of what I have.
Then its particular light
on woods, on rivers, on the sea,
became my beginning in the coloured world
in which I had not yet had my beginning.
I am so frightened, I am so frightened,
of the unexpected sunrise finishing,
and tears and the excitement finishing.
I don't fight it, my love is this fear,
I nourish it who can nourish nothing,
love's slipshod watchman.
Fear hems me in.
I am conscious that these minutes are short
and that the colours in my eyes will vanish
when your face sets.
The wind is whistling violently through the cracks in the door. It is quite alarming.
Ending, this week
This week has been nothing but endings.
Sticky endings, pulled apart with little
mucus ropes hanging together.
Clean endings, one schwap
of the axe and cut.
Mixed up endings, where
goodbye sounds like hello coming
from a pair of red Rocky Horror lips
that you later find out
is your sphincter.
This week I realized I am dying.
And for some reason all I want
is a hamburger, greasy.
I want to shove the thin
ground beef patty into my
open mouth. Squeeze a couple
ketchup covered fries in.
Suck frantically at the straw of my Coke
like it is life’s elixir.
My hands are covered
in grease, and I have a
funny feeling my soul is drenched.
Smeared shiny and sticky, I roll
in Hiroshima ash and curl.
I am a sugar covered donut.
This week I haven’t showered,
only spun in my own
fevered nightmares, my sweaty
sheets heavy as a lecher’s kiss—
an executioner’s axe—
the 1.65 ounces of metal
that it takes to put a bullet through
another human’s head.
This week I found the fear of death
hidden behind my puckering
navel. It was hard to find, because
it’s fear of life’s conjoined, bloody fetus.
So ugly, but I can’t turn my Oreo eyes
away. They’re now shrink wrapped and
labeled for resale ease.
This week I knew everything.
The first kiss of a dying couple, Osama Bin Laden’s underwear brand, your mother, the white and yellow Rx bottle used as a teddy bear, the space between the boot and the landmine, the dash in between the dates on the gravestone, a cheap hooker’s retarded brother, the wind on an Ugandan’s face, multiple orgasms, a dying pigeon’s final breath ignored, empty buses, cloudy sunsets, chewed bubble gum, the reason you need to pray.
It’s commonplace, really.
I am nothing. I am everything. I am ending.
I have lived in Auckland my whole life and feel quite at home here. I know all of the nooks and crannies of this city and it brings me great joy. Some places in particular that I like are:
- The Laingholm, Titirangi area. It is close to where I grew up though it is not too far out of the city to make you feel out of touch with humanity. It is a peaceful place nestled away in the bush, it has an arty sort of feel and the people are so lovely.
- West coast beaches such as Piha, Murawai, Bethells. These beaches are perhaps half an hour drive from civilization but they are quite beautiful. To me, they are what all beaches should be; the booming waves, idyllic surroundings, BLACK sand – all the things that I grew up with.
- K Rd (aka Karangahape Road). I suppose you could call in the cultural centre of Auckland, strangely enough, it is also our red light district. As I now live just off K rd, I am quite used to the medley of strange characters that dwell on the road; the raving lunatics, the homeless, the drunks, the transvestites, the prostitutes and the hipsters. Mostly they keep to themselves. There are a wide variety of op shops, art galleries and cafes – everything a hipster needs.
- Waiheke Island. To get here, you catch a ferry from downtown Auckland; this will take you 30 minutes. The island is actually quite vast; but there are the few popular places that people mostly go to. Whenever I go there, I feel such a wonderful sense of community and it is a very arty community at that. Known for its vineyards and quiet beaches, it is really the ideal place for me.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
yesterday I escorted a good friend to a meeting at Lucky Coq. While she attended this meeting of hers I killed time by investigating some sweet as stores on the upper (?) end of Chapel street. The non-club end. I never go out on Chapel Street because it is always way too done up for me and you pretty much always get groped, no matter what you do, say or look like.
Melbourne is quite fantastic. If you forgot or don't even know, here are a few reasons why.
-Lucky Coq in Prahan (and Bimbo's in Collingwood/Fitzroy or whatever - it's on Brunswick st) has $4 pizzas at very accessible hours and they are motherfucking tasty as all hell. I had one that is basically nachos on pizza. I felt that I needed to give it a try. They also have decently gourmet ones featuring the likes of salmon and proscuitto and various cheeses.
-abundance of quirky stores in unexpected places. Chapel street for me is mostly full of icky, glitzy expensive places that I will never buy anything from (see: American Apparel, Ed Hardy, various boutiquey places etc). But if you get off at Windsor train station and walk down towards the main bit from there you go past all these really sweet op shops. I think that if it was just slightly bigger, my new favourite op shop would be Fat Helen's. In terms of price I'd put it lower than Retrostar but higher than Savers. We're talking Lost and Found Market prices. They had a fairly good stash of Sega games and swizzle sticks. Oh and Tintin tshirts ($22, fyi). I also went into this really cool store full of antique furniture. It fell into the category of stores that I will never buy anything from, but it was epicly awesome. The kind of place you wander around quite utterly awestruck. There is also a Very Good bookstore pretty much right across from the train station that, when Shu Shu and I entered it, was home to three cats that clearly owned the place. cats just give everything a real good feeling.
-the train system. I know heaps of people don't really get into Connex in a big way, but I personally have always enjoyed the sensation of being driven somewhere. I get into train journeys. I particularly like the way the city looks when you approach it from a south eastern direction; from Prahan way. You feel a bit lower, a bit less important, and Melbourne seems quite grand and slightly imposing. Plus me and Shu Shu saw a real big dog on the way back to the city (see: picture above)
-general bars/restaurants/cafes. I wish I was wealthy enough to always dine out or be out in general. I passed a lot of warm places up that end of Chapel street.
Hey anyway, I love this city. I guess I wanted to tell everyone about it instead of thinking about some other things that are happening inside me.
Friday, July 10, 2009
I want to tell you a little bit of a story about blog-sploration before I go. When you check your Google reader every day it becomes really boring to have only a few things to read.. so I took it upon myself to add more blogs to my library. I actually was googling the Lost and Found Market in Collingwood to check if their website had been updated to something more than the postcard they hand out when you buy something and no they have not. But I had noticed that some girl's blog came up when I googled the market soooo I went there and found it to have a really good list of local blogs that she reads. I encourage a perusal of this list if you live in Melbourne (by you I mean imaginary compendium of blog readers). From there I got Meet me at Mike's, who have this really cool layout that reminds me of these books that I used to have as a child.. THERE, on her website, she suggests you look at this website along with a lot of other handy hints for awesome blog cultivation. SO THEN I GOOGLED FREE BLOG DESIGNS & THAT'S HOW I FOUND YUMMY LOLLY AND NOW I HAVE A PRETTY LAYOUT.
Incidentally, at the same time I was researching gigs in Melbourne (I don't know why; I'm not even there at the moment) on Faster Louder and then went to this other website which is like a general guide to all that is awesome in Melbourne WHERE I FOUND this sorta.. event suggestion thing that was *we are now approaching the actual incident, the purpose of this rant.. purpose???* mentioned at work the other week. Basically, it's like this exhibition of illustrations or paintings or whatever the hell they are and there's this tattooist in the corner who will give you free tatts of his designs! And this is happening tomorrow the 11th of July and next Saturday the 18th. I would like to go for interest's sake (plus I want a tattoo and getting one for free would be fairly awesome) and to see how many people show up to get themselves tattooed!! And so I have subscribed to the RSS feed of this neat website which is actually called Three Thousand - OMG I JUST REALISED THAT IS REALLY CLEVER BECAUSE IT IS THE POSTCODE OF THE CBD!!!
And that is probably enough general commentary about my travels on the interwebs because I could probably be watching something really awesome like Juvies on telly.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
One weekend; one stage.
The Parking Lot Experiments
yay local bands of complete win and whimsy
chilled out awesome storytelling folk
gypsy folk insanity for dance fun
I must see these girls play
John Darnielle & Owen Pallet
uniting to create the superband Mountain Fantasy
cos apparently he puts on quite the show?
Noah & the Whale
oh jensy jens
Lonely Drifter Karen
German cabaret ftw
There'd also be like artist stalls from Wartook & Natimuk - small local towns full of arty/crafty folk
For food.. I'll kidnap a representative from Lazzat's (tasty Malaysian foodz), someone from 'Dirty' Dumplings, get the Dadswell's Bridge Indian Restaurant to have their stall, there will be a jam donut lady, a baked potato person and a stall bearing wares from Cafe Baghdad (general cafe goods of awesome quality).
Toilet/bathroom facilities would be those weird sawdust contraptions they had at falls. So like NOT port-a-loos. There's still TP though, and toilet seats. And I don't feel there's a particular need for shower facilities seeing how it's only for one night.
Channelling the goodness of Golden Plains, there would be somewhere in the realm of 2500-4000 tickets sold (hopefully)
Actually I just realised that this is all very Wimmera-centric. I guess maybe most festivals begin like that..? you want to showcase bands that are really dear to you, a place that is beautiful.. just the kind of thing you want to share with your friends.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
My festival would be at Tapapakanga Regional Park just out of Auckland city. I've been to a festival there and it is really beautiful. It is right beside the ocean and it has a really nice space, not overly huge so it would just be a smallish festival. But honestly, festivals in NZ are so wonderful because they are not so big and overcrowded. The festival will be two days long and there is a camping site just a small hike up the hill from where the stages are. Honestly, the only thing for these types of affairs are Port-o-Loos and they are disgusting but also part of the experience. They would, however, be cleaned regularly. There would be a lot of vegetarian, organic food stalls; but also the normal stuff like burgers, pizza, icecream, breakfast food, café food etc. In terms of other activities/events, there would be clothes and crafts stalls, book stalls and crafty things.
The bands I would invite are:
Sigur Ros, Owen, The Mountain Goats, Teacups, Songs: Ohia, Broken Social Scene, Sufjan Stevens, Tegan and Sara, Explosions in the Sky, Mogwai, Scout Niblett, Leader Cheetah, Kimya Dawson, Kaki King, Joanna Newsom, Jens Lekman, Iron and Wine, Emiliana Torrini, Elvis Perkins, Cat Power, Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy, Belle and Sebastian, Beach House, Arcade Fire, Band of Horses, Andrew Bird.
I also want to invite comedians such as:
Flight of The Conchords, Eugene Mirman, Stewart Lee, Richard Herring, Demetri Martin, David O’Doherty, Ricky Gervais, Zach Galifianakis.
It would pretty much be awesome.